...a geography meme

There are several things I could be doing right now to prepare for the week ahead. But I'm waiting for the brown rice to cook for dinner (and it can't be rushed) so I sat down to check out a few blogs. Limes threw down a challenge that is hard for me to resist: A Geography meme (what a fun word!). Here's how it works:

You must begin your post with a geographical joke-- What did Mississippi say to Missouri? Idaho, Alaska. She said, "What did Delaware?"

Then credit the geographical joke to the source--hmmm....this is a joke I learned years ago in grade school when we were memorizing the states and capitals.

Then in as few words as possible, explain your earliest recollection/ awareness of the following:

Europe - From the time I was a little girl I knew that our family version of Heinz-57 was German-English-Irish-French-Norwegian-Welsch. (My children have only added Dutch to that mix--hence the fair skin and hair.) Family stories abounded with accounts of a great-great grandmother from Norway selling a baby to buy passage for the rest of the family, a great-great uncle from Germany who was a horse thief (or was that a murderer?), a great grandmother from Ireland hiding a flat iron in the folds of her skirt because her luggage was overweight.
America - I was a child in the 60s--we practiced hiding under our desks in case the Communists attacked and dropped an atomic bomb on us. Memorizing the Pledge of Allegience as a 1st grader was a must.
Africa - In about 3rd grade missionary nuns visited our school. Their habits were white--so angelic-looking compared to our nuns all in black. We practiced baptising little heathen babies. (Yikes. This makes me shudder now.)
Australia - While I still enjoyed baby-of-the-family status (for 5 years it was mine!) relatives came to visit us in Hawaii. At the airport store I spotted a koala bear--and had to own it! One of the few times I remember being indulged as the baby (although there were probably others--Arlene can probably list quite a few!). Why a stuffed koala was being sold in an airport in Hawaii puzzles me now. At the time I just accepted that it was from Australia--wherever that was. I still have the ratty old thing.
Asia - Dad traveled to Japan (he was in the Navy) and brought back gifts. A neighbor drove us to the airport to meet his plane. Mom was in the hospital, having just given birth to my sister Lani. It was 1965.
Then say what is your furthest point traveled -
North - Fort St. John, BC Canada to visit a nephew (by marriage) and his family. Summer '96.
South - Morelia, Michoacan, Mexico. August '08
East - Italy in 2000 with my children (and a group from church, including a priest who caused more problems that any of the children ever could have). (Another shudder.)
West - Hawaii. I was 4 when we moved there and 8 when we left. My three youngest siblings were born there.
Longest time living in one place and where was it? Umatilla, Oregon. When we hit the 6 year mark, that was the longest I had ever lived anywhere in my entire life. We lived there for another 11 years.
Shortest time living in one place and where was it? Just a few months in an apartment in La Grande, Oregon. It was just before I got married and dad invited me to move back home to save money. I took him up on it. The apartment was the one that our great-grandmother had lived in for several years before she died. Just a coincidence that I rented the same place.
Brief list of places lived, in rough order of appearance: Whidbey Island, WA, Bainbridge, MD, Castro Valley, CA, Halleiwa, HI, Newport, RI, Vancouver, WA, San Diego, CA, Cove, OR, La Grande, OR, Peace River, AB, Calgary, AB, Cove, OR, Umatilla, OR, and finally....Podunk, where I am now.
How many addresses have you had? I'd have to ask mom about my early childhood but I come up with 22.

Thanks, Limes! Rice was cooked, stir-fry eaten, I finished this, and there's still time to do my chores!